Dreams
by Relics
Summary: Alucard can't understand why he's having nightmares, so he asks a certain vampire who clings to her humanity for some answers. AxS fluff
1. Nightmares

This is my first Hellsing fic!-claps- I kinda worked hard on it, so if you flame me, be nice about it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hellsing..-coughs- T.T But...ONE DAY....I SHALL RULE THE WORLD!!

alu:-throws a book at her-

O-O HEY!

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_Never opened myself this way  
Life is ours, we live it our way  
All these words I don't just say  
And nothing else matters_ -- Metallica, Nothing Else Matters

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_Pain. That was all Alucard could feel as he lay there on the table, his crimson eyes glazed and dull. In his body were a multitude of blades, but the one that stuck out was the long one that had impaled his heart. He could feel himself slowly dieing, actually feel his own blood seeping out of his body._

_**"This is your defeat, Count,"** A voice whispered, and the vampire strained to look up and focus at the face. Yet, he could not get a clear view, no matter how hard he tried. **"This is no nightmare."**_

_He tried to snarl back, tried to defend himself, but only blood seeped out of the corners of his mouth. Footsteps came toward him and stopped in front of him. Again, he tried to focus and came up empty handed. But as he listened, the voice suddenly started going from masculine...to feminine._

_**"Your dominion are no more. Your power is no more," **It said before it became horrifyingly familiar. **"..The Police Girl is dead."**_

_Instantly, he was able to focus and stared, wide-eyed, at his Master. Integra. She was pointing a gun, his OWN gun at him, like it was nothing. **"You are a pretty pathetic No-Life King..Now that you have nothing...You were born a dog..You lived as a dog...And now you will die as a dog..."**_

_She pressed the gun to his forehead, cocking it. **"May God and Her Majesty be with You."** She stared pulling the trigger, whispering,**"Amen."**_

* * *

Alucard opened his eyes slowly, taking in his surroundings. He opened them more and for a split second nearly panicked before he forced himself to calm down. "A dream," He snarled, his body drenched in blood. He started to tremble with fury and uncertainty. "Dreams...To think, **ME**, dreaming....And having a..." He didn't allow himself to say it, he refused to. Humans and weaklings had dreams. He did not. 

Yet, there he was, laying in his coffin, trembling and sweating out blood. The vampire groaned and pressed the button, waiting impatiently for the lid to rise on the coffin bed. He climbed out, glancing at the clock on his wall and snarling at it.

Ten A.M. Way too early to be up. Cursing in about three different languages, he grabbed his trenchcoat from a chair and wiped his blood off on it, still trying to calm down. He felt a strange pain in his chest, a constriction in his throat, and it baffled him. "What is it?" He pondered aloud, baring his fangs. "What's the matter with me?"

A low and feral growl escaped his lips as he paced around slightly, suddenly feeling wide awake. His body protested, wanting to sleep, but his mind kept replaying the dream over and over again. He groaned, nearly feeling the pain of his master's own blade impaling his heart, of getting shot by his own gun.

_It was like that time before,_ He thought, still bristling with fury. _Except this time..._ A shudder shot through his spine, as he was suddenly unable to control how he felt. Rage, betrayel, and another strange feeling coursed through his body, and he could not stop them.

It made Alucard feel helpless.

And Alucard **hated **feeling helpless.

Sitting down, Alucard slowly started to calm down, pushing violent thoughts away from his sleep-deprived mind. The pain started to slowly fade, but his throat still felt constricted. _Vampires do not have dreams,_ He kept trying to convince himself, repeating it over and over again to himself. _Vampires do not have dreams, vampires do not have dreams, vampires do not have dreams, vampires do not have---_

_Wait..._ He closed his eyes and opened them. _Maybe I don't have dreams...At least that often...But.._ His eyes traveled to the wall of his room, and he could nearly see who was on the other side, sleeping peacefully. _..I know someone who does...._ Standing up, he trotted over to the wall and phased through it, looking around. As he expected, Seras was fast asleep in her coffin.

Asking himself exactly why he was in his fledgling's room and not in his, he sat down in a chair, stared at the coffin intently, and waited.

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Seras didn't know what exactly woke her up from her deep sleep, but she grudgingly thought that it better be good. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she pressed the button on her bed controller, yawning as it slowly lifted up. But she nearly jumped when she saw Alucard sitting in a chair, head down, eyes closed. 

The police girl had never seen him like this. Instead of his usual attire, he only wore black pants, no shirt. His chest was lean and pale, a scar visible just where his heart would be. His hair was longer than usual, to about his shoulders, yet she had never felt him seem so...so....

_Lost. _She thought simply. That's what he looked like. And if her master was reading her thoughts, he certainly did not show it. Before she could say anything, he spoke.

"Dreams," He muttered tonelessly. "Such useless things....Showing a world that is not meant to be, an illusion, a halucination, a projection of the heart's desire, a manifestation of the darkness that creeps through one's mind..." He looked up, opening his eyes. "Useless...Pointless... Meaningless..."

Seras stood up and took a hesitant step toward him. "..Master?" She said softly, but he made no movement to show he heard her.

"Dreams are for the ones who would rather find the solice their pathetic heart craves than face the reality of the world," He continued. "Heh....It's sad really...when it comes right down to it...I'm over 400 years old...I've fought more battles, recieved more wounds, vanquished more foes...And I can't even handle something as small as a mere dream..." His tone was bitter as something dripped onto the floor. The police girl blinked and stared at it.

Blood.

_Blood? But.._

At first she didn't understand. But all of a sudden, she was hit by a wave of anguish that almost made her cry out. And it was coming from her Master. "Master.." She whispered, gulping slightly. "..You're...You're crying....Aren't you?" No reply, which just justified her statement.

"You cling pitifully to your humanity, Police Girl," He said softly, not bothering to wipe away the small streams of blood forming on his cheeks. "So tell me: What is the meaning of these dreams that refuse me the sleep I desire? Why do I tremble when I try to recall them? Why do I fear them; Does that make me weak?" His eyes locked onto hers. "Or do you not have the answers that I seek?"

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-nervous laughter- This was supposed to be a one shot thing...But it'll be at least two chapters....Read and Review if you want, just to let me know that someone's out there. 


	2. Peace

**I don't think I have EVER...EVER...EVER had such nice reviews. o.O And so many! You all have no idea how happy it makes me, and how much it hurries chapters along. Alas, this is the last chapter, because while some of the reviewers had GREAT ideas (Can't name them right now, gomen ne!) I just can't see it right now. But do not despair! n.n I have a few more ideas for some fics, one that involves snow, and one that involves...well, it's a little hard to explain, but Seras gains a friend when Alucard does something very drastic that involves a teenager, Father Alexander, and a dark plot. o.o So if any of you are interest, then tell me!**

**Again, thank you SO much for the reviews! You guys rock! So, enjoy the chapter! Don't forget to drop me a review!**

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_So tear me open, pour me out  
There's things inside that scream and shout  
And the pain still hates me  
So hold me until it sleeps_ **-Metallica, Until It Sleeps**

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For a moment, Seras couldn't answer. Her mind went blank, her jaw slacked very slightly, and she could not look away from his intense and pained gaze. His words started to sink in, and then she looked at him, **really **looked at him, as if for the first time. Instead of teasing and cruelty, violence and bloodlust, his eyes just held a sorrow that cut her to the core, a wound that had never been healed properly. She wanted to suddenly embrace him, hold him, make that look go away. 

This wasn't the Master she knew.

Alucard only looked away when Seras'crimson eyes started to soften, a gently smile gracing her lips. She walked over and sat down on her knees, trying to catch his eyes again. "...So even Master has his days," She whispered, and recieved no reply. She didn't expect one, and just kept smiling. Instead, she rested her head againist his knee, sighing softly. The sudden contact would have normally infuriated Alucard. He didn't like being touched at all very much, and his fledgling was becoming very bold.

But he didn't feel anger; Again, he didn't know what he felt about it. It was But, of course, he immediently rejected these thoughts. Stifling a sigh, he just turned his head away. "...Master, will you look at me?" Seras asked gently, and again recieved no reply. "I can't help you if you won't look at me..."

A very low growl escaped his lips, but the police girl let it pass. "...You're not weak, master...Just because you dream...Everyone does," She assured softly. "They're not all bad...And some people don't think that they are useless at all. They can actually be very nice."

"I don't dream," Alucard growled softly, glaring at her half-heartedly. "Do not make it sound like this is an everyday affair because I can assure you, it is not."

Seras nodded. "I know it's not, Master..." She agreed. "...It can't be since you're taking this so hard." Alucard couldn't mask his suprise at the statement, and just stared at her. She chuckled slightly. "Sorry. But...I guess for someone like me...As weak as me...Dreams are no big deal. I'mused to them. But they're not all bad, Master."

Alucard just grunted, growling again. She watched him, noticing he was avoiding her gaze again and stood up. She walked over to her bed and sat down. She patted the spot beside her and smiled invitingly. The expression on her Master's face was a cross between confusion and bewilderment before it actually sunk in. He hesitated before standing up, walking over, and taking a seat beside her.

"Now then," She said in a tone that seemed just a little too chipper for the vampire at the moment,"Tell me about it."

"..About what?"

"About your nightmare." He blinked and gave her a suspicious look. She only smiled patiently. "Sometimes it's better if you talk about. You know, get it out of your system. That way, it doesn't seem as scary." To Alucard, this seemed like an asanine suggestion. He didn't even want to think about it, so how was talking about it going to make the situation better? Besides, it wasn't any of her business...

_So why did you come to her?_ A voice whispered, and the vampire chose to again ignore it. He didn't feel like answering to those nagging voices inside his head that never went away. He sighed and shook his head.

"Why?" He asked, staring at the floor. Seras blinked and also looked at the floor. "How is talking about it going to help?"

"...It...It's..." The blonde faltered, groping for the right words to describe it. After a few seconds, and just smiled. "...Trust me on this, Master...I won't tell anyone about them. On my honor." She saluted, still smiling.

"Why don't you tell me one of yours instead?" He muttered, eyeing her. "You tell me your nightmares, and I'll tell you mine." She blinked and nodded, stretching suddenly.

"Alright then," She agreed, pulling her knees to her chest. "...You want to know mine...Well...I used to have nightmares about my parents when I was a younger girl...About my mother and how she died. And in my dreams, my father died with her...And I was all alone..And when you're young...That's a terrifying prospect...You don't want to grow old or grow up with no one to lean on, no one to comfort you, no home to go to. Now...I always have nightmares about..." She hesitated, sighing heavily. Alucard watched her, interested in spite of himself.

"...Go on..." He urged softly, wiping some blood away from his cheek. She gave him a little smile and looked at the cieling.

"..Now...I sometimes...I'll see you, Master." Alucard made a small sound of suprise and stared at her. She didn't meet his gaze, her bangs covering her eyes. "...And I rememeber of all those times you've fought and gotten hurt so badly...I know that you always came back...but you never do in my dreams...You're always gone. Dead. Whether it be by that priest or Incognito...You always die, Master...and I can never save you. Ever. I just...stand there and watch you die." She sniffled slightly and rubbed her eyes. "I'm sorry, Master..It's just...You..I...I don't want to lose you."

Alucard didn't say anything, just continued to stare steadly at her. His eyes held no mockery or anger. The look they held was almost soft. Seras hiccuped softly, rubbing her eyes again. "Huh?" She gasped softly when she felt something soft on her shoulder. She looked down and saw her Master laying his head on it, closing his eyes. "...Master?"

"...I'm scared of that, too, Police Girl," He said very softly, so soft that she had to strain to hear it. "...I'm scared of...of...of dieing...And staying dead. Of being betrayed by those I care for. Of losing those I love. Of being defeated by those unworthy." He sighed, nuzzling her bare shoulder slightly and breathing in her scent. It was sweet and deep, reminding him vaguely of roses. She stiffened slightly and relaxed, smiling at him.

"...Master..." She whispered, and layed her head on top of his. He was shaking very slightly, but he was still shaking. "...You know that won't happen, Master...Nobody is going to betray you...No one you care for and love are going anywhere." Her Master nodded a little, his hair tickling her skin. She giggled a little, and sighed contently. They sat in silence, Alucard slowly calming down and feeling more at peace than he had in a long time.

Seras stifled a yawn finally and stretched her legs. "...Feel better, Master?" She asked, smiling again. He nodded a little, though he seemed hesitant when he did. She frowned slightly. She didn't want him to have another nightmare, but they both needed sleep. Badly. She thought about it and smiled suddenly. "..Hey, Master?"

"..What?"

"Do you want to sleep with me?" He stared at her with wide eyes, not sure if he heard her correctly. She caught the look and blinked. "I used to crawl in my parent's bed whenever I had a bad dream...And when I was with them, they'd go away. Guess it works because you aren't alone." Alucard thought about it for a moment and nodded.

"..Alright..." She smiled at him and rooted underneath the coffin, pulling out an extra pillow. She handed it to him and scooted over to one side. He rubbed his cheeks more and layed down beside her, putting his back to hers as she closed the coffin lid.

"Good night, Master." The vampire only grunted in reply, but the fledgling was not hurt. She only smiled and closed her eyes, sleeping deeply in a few minutes. Alucard waited until he was sure she was asleep before turning over and watched her. He sighed softly before moving closer to her and wrapped his arms around her, laying his head on her shoulder again.

"Good night, Police Girl," He whispered, and closed his eyes. And this time, his dreams were anything but terrifying.

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n.n I love fluff! Don't you love fluff! I hoped you all liked it. o.O I actually did! So anways, please review and tell me what you think about me ideas. And if you want to know more, just email me. Adios! 


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